Fred's Girl Tattoos Her Love

Wondering Where it Came From

Sitting at home, with 2 hours left on my clock to fill those minutes with entertainment before Logan comes reving up my street to pick me up and take me to Starbucks to do yet another marathon of homework, I decided to turn on my camera and see what happens.

First take on October 17th, 2008:
"blah blah blah my name is veronica and I make really lame videos on Youtube"

Second take:
"maybe I am just not that cut out for it"

Thrid take:
"what should I do...I can do a cartwheel...or I can..do something my dad told me to do that one time what was it...oh yea FREDS GIRL"

Three lame Youtubes later, with an exception to like one, then my lastest one scored two thousand hits! (Mind you, the most I have ever gotten was like eighty, so two-thousand in one day...I was borderline freaking out)

I am Fred's girl, and I have two more videos to come. So far, so fabulous.

Then onto the inter parts of my brain that need to wake up so I can keep up the subscribers and viewers (apparently other people besides my dad like to watch them too, who would have thunk?)

My dad thinks I am onto something, I might just have to take his word of it.

I Want To Be Fred's Girl

Hobbit For a Day

Adventurous on a Wednesday morning, I woke up to the sounds of the gardeners weekly routine.

So loud.

I have midterms to study for today and I also wanted to start on my children's book about Emma. I love Emma, and I want to write all about my imaginary baby.

I also need lots of coffee, and very little distraction. Over and out, this hobbit is running back into her hole. I won't be out until my brain is so empty of creativity that I can't even make a coffee drink, and thats like second nature.

Introduction To My Theory of Truth

Theory: A response to Decartes

Sitting still with a tea in my hand, and the wind delicately blowing the strands of hair off my face, I could only help but wonder why it feels so real. I contemplated what was real almost the entire time throughout my life, but have only now understood the concept that it is necessary to live without doubting the truth in order to accomplish anything. As I was reading Decartes, I noticed something that might not otherwise be noticed or conceived in the same fashion as what I am about to present to you. For just a recap, Decartes found himself as a ‘thinking thing’ and found himself the only thing that he himself knew for sure existed. Do I exist? Well, like Decartes, because I doubt therefore I think, and thinking is a function of a thing, the brain, therefore I am. Nothing in the world as a thing, concept, logic or idea is real in the sense that it can be continually questioned and researched. There isn’t a solid truth, even though it may be universally accepted, as the grass is green, and may all things be tested and doubted.

If we take all things, matter and energy, and classify them as false, or what they contain can be questioned, then all of society would live on edge, not trusting one another. So in a sense, we need to live by certain by standards and accept most things perceived and validated by our senses as true. Then it got me thinking, what happens if truth within itself is a perception, and on the basis of your individual definition, find indeed things that are true, without the perception of your senses, but by you who exist can find truth in a matter solely inside of you.

Now to get into clarity of what I have proposed, I had already studied this in my own head, because if honest truth can be found and it isn’t solely the truth of one’s existence, then I must be able to prove it within myself in order to see the truth in others.

According to Decartes, he exists solely because he doubts. Now, I exist because I can doubt as well. In taking this fact, I take it one step further. What is it in you that makes you exist other than the function you are already carrying out? If there is truth behind your existence then you must be able to identify yourself before you can explain it. This is a concept I have been trying to figure out for a long time now, why me? How is it that ‘me’ as an entity has the ability to do like others do but still keep my own identity. If I am able to make the connection between ‘me’ as a thing, as an entity, without the ability of being able to do anything except exist, to something that allows ‘me’ to carry out functions like ‘you’ or ‘them’, then I believe I can find things true without doubting them or testing them.

Be Prepared To Meet Your Only

Be prepared to meet your only
Only one who can defeat your usual
Like you mess them, you mess me
Feel free to make it your sole mission
So much you aim now target to conquer me over
No staying close to you or meet me by the foyer
Now I am just waiting for an excuse to topple over
Because maybe it’s a crush or an obsession I need now more than ever to lower
Standing tall now freeze the frame
Trying to pull a fast one on my game.

Journalism Homework: College?

“7:04am” reads my clock, and my alarm is blaring in my ear. Who in their right mind wakes up this early? Last time I woke up this early, I was in high school? Oh my, high school. It took too long to graduate but went by way too fast. Now I am in college, currently attending Saddleback, and my clock now reads, “7:06am”. I roll out of bed contemplating why I even bother to get ready and go to school. By now I know too well that no one truly cares if I go to school today. Why should I even go? I am so tired, lazy, pissed off and mornings tend to make me very ugly. There isn’t a reason why I shouldn’t crawl back into bed and if and when I feel like finally getting up, I will remember to burn all of my books and drop out of school. But then something inside me, something that never drove me through high school, and that my friends, is my thirst for knowledge and my thirst to become something unheard of. I don’t know exactly where I am headed in the future, but as of right now, driving to school at seven-thirty in the morning doesn’t seem half bad, in fact, I kind of enjoy it.

The difference between high school and college is truly like night and day. High school was meant to teach you life and college in a sense allowed you to solely grow and create it. In high school, I had always felt like I needed to “stick it” to society and well frankly, society let me get away with a hell of a lot. But college on the hand takes away all those boundaries but yet, I still find myself choosing to stay in them. It forces you to think harder than any other school years you had experienced. Because of this, I am smarter, stronger and better at making decisions, and I am continually growing.

To someone that is just entering college, I advise you to first and foremost take your “I think I know it all” attitude and flush it down the toilet. You won’t need it, because you don’t know it all, and you can’t grow until you are willing to. College falls, in most cases, in the end of teenage years and in the beginning of adulthood. This stage is when you change from person A to person Z. Sorry folks, you are not you anymore, but a more knowledgeable you, an experienced you, and hopefully a better you.

In the constant rush you find yourself in to finish high school you end up at the bottom of a very steep hill with no promise at the end. You will be scared, well actually you will be terrified but do not worry because you are not alone. Everyone is going through it, as did I, and college will continue to grow with you and not against you.

Don't Stare Like You Own Me

Stop looking at me that way as though you can rescue me and show me the way. I know you can but I don’t want you to because maybe I love my lack of determination and every inch of you reminds me of what I could be. And that leaves me with a disgusting feeling in my mouth. Shame on you. Shame on you for believing in me. Might as well believe in nothing because that’s how close I am to becoming me. Stop looking at me, every sight of you makes me cry every part of you reminds me of how I am not doing better and how I will never change. Whats wrong with you? Stop following me. I have learned to hate you, every bit of you.


Stop loving me and believing in me.


I hate you.

The Other Me

Something that takes all of you
Eats you up and spits you out
There is nothing you can do
What can you do?
You lost, at this game you eagerly play
What is there left to feel?
When your greatest love gave you away?

Once in a while, it comes up behind you, and reminds you of how great it would be to feel it.
And once in a while, if you listen closely you can hear your parallel life succeeding, allowing you to fail miserably.
Why can’t I be on that side?
Why can’t I be her?
We share the same life with the same personality and we both have the same tendencies to cry and laugh.
We both love coffee and brown haired boys.
We both had everything we needed to be who we were born to be but she went ahead and did it.
She went positive and left me negative.
How did she do it?

Why couldn’t that be me?